If I was wholeheartedly going to give myself to Him at the expectant age of 18, what would that potentially mean for my future?
I’ll never forget the moment where I decided I was all in, that He was the way, the truth and the life (John 14:6) and the One I would give my life to know and follow. On November 18th, 2007, I made that everlasting covenant with our God that forever, He alone would receive my worship, love and adoration for all that He is.
This is what it all still boils down to for me: a life of worship, a life lived ‘as unto the Lord’ (Colossians 3:23). Whether that’s in the way I set out to treat people, the way I embrace what I don’t understand, the way I love my family or the way I give praise and worship, both at home and when I’m gathered with His church corporately on a Sunday. I’ve made that steadfast commitment to Him and my praise and worship in every season stands as a declaration of this covenant relationship I have with Him.
I’ve learned throughout time not to hold God to ransom over final outcomes. I’ve learned not to base my heart-driven response to Him on circumstances, feelings or on the very outcomes I’d indeed like to see. I’ve learned to take away the power of outside influences that rob God of getting the worth due to His name from me.
These attitudes war against the very purpose of our worship. Preferences should not have the permission to hold the weight they do in our lives. These perspectives quickly bring ‘self’ as the focus and we forget the bigger picture. One morning when I was reflecting on the preferences and expectations that arise in us that, I felt the Holy Spirit say, 'approaching worship in this way is like needing every circumstance to align for you to come and successfully love your wife.’ It was a reality check. I knew deep in my heart that relationship was never designed to work this way. Love is always a choice, and it isn’t based on whether things unfold the way I want them to. It was a reminder to me that worship is wholeheartedly about my coming to love Him. Full stop.
The argument over my unveiled and heart-felt response to Him was settled on that day back in 2007. That even if He did nothing else in my life (amazingly His grace and goodness and mercy follows me every day, but even if it didn’t!), He has already given me the highest offering in laying down His only Son. Furthermore, He has given me the gift of His Holy Spirit who is with me always.
With every chance I get and no matter the setting, I will raise the hallelujah that only I can, because He has given me the freedom to choose to worship Him and that is what I will do!